These simple tips [...]]]> You’re curious and who could blame you? Her ass is totally uncharted territory. Much like the first explorers of Mount Everest, you’re anticipating the journey to either be the best of your life or fall deep into a deadly crevasse leading to your untimely death (or at least get slapped in the face).

These simple tips will help ensure the journey is a pleasurable one for her and for you.

For The Love Of (whichever deity you so choose), DO NOT:

• Go “From the stink to the pink”: This goes for your fingers, mouth, penis, or any other object. This can lead to very serious infections caused by E. Coli. Not only is it gross, it’ll lead to weeks of not getting laid while she’s taking antibiotics.

•  Do it dry: Use lube. Lots and lots of lube. Let’s just be frank about this one: asses aren’t stretchy and pliable like a vagina and they don’t produce their own moisture. The flesh there is thinner, so they’re prone to tearing. This can be lessened by the use of lube, but more than just what comes with the condom. (If you’re not convinced and decide to embark on this adventure without lube, I hope your girlfriend has the guts to forcibly shove something in your ass without lube. And if she doesn’t, I’ll find you and do it for her.)

DO:

•  Talk to her about it first: Communication is key. Make sure she’s comfortable with it first. The anus is a pretty good indicator of willingness, and if she’s not willing it’ll pucker tighter than the first time she tried bungee jumping. While a tight ass sounds hot in theory, it’s likely to result in pain for both of you. This step is probably the hardest part.

• Work your way up to it: Start by placing your finger on the outside of her anus and simply letting it rest there. This can add extra stimulation (especially if you’re taking her from behind) without diving right into the deep end. Once she’s comfortable with that, slowly place your finger inside of her during intercourse for a change of pace. Once you’re both comfortable, you can move on in size and depth.

Got any sexual things you’re totally anal about? Post below in the Comments!